This month, PPI celebrates Pride. Pride is about people embracing who they are and coming together to show how far gay rights have come. Although awareness and support for the community continue to grow, members still face discrimination and mental health struggles. During June, we want to educate and encourage you to learn more about how you can be a better ally to the LGBTQ community and support this celebration of acceptance and love.
The LBGTQ+ community faces devastatingly high rates of mental illness, including elevated rates of depression, substance abuse and suicide. Reportedly, around 65% of people in the community experience harassment and discrimination as well.
Factors of stigma, rejection, discrimination, shame, and fear all play a role in the daily challenges those in the community face. Supporting a loved one, whether it’s a friend or a family member, goes a long way in building their confidence and showing that you fully accept them for who they are.
Here’s what you can do to support someone you love:
1. Consider Your Biases
Sometimes our biases can cause us to act in a discriminatory manner without being aware of it. Reflect on your own thoughts and perceptions and take a closer look at what you say or do. It is okay to make mistakes and ask questions, as it is part of your own learning process.
“We don’t have to understand something to support it. We can support our loved one while working to understand. There are lots of resources available to help educate us,” notes the lead provider of PPI’s LGBTQ Clinic, Katharine B Dalke, MD MBE. Some helpful resources are listed below.
2. Acknowledge Your Loved One’s Identity
Learning about your loved one’s sexual identity and orientation may come as a shock. Just by acknowledging, accepting and respecting, they’re already in a better head space. Avoid silence.
Dr. Dalke recommends: “Actively affirm your loved one by using their chosen name and pronouns. Using someone’s chosen pronouns can be lifesaving. Just by being a supportive presence you are helping them thrive and be safe.”
LGBTQ youth are the largest part of homeless youth in the US. A study found that transgender youth have lower suicide rates when people around them use their chosen pronouns and names.
3. Have their Back
“I see parents struggle with understanding what LGBTQ means to the person they love. They often fear that something bad will happen to them because of it. However, the single most important protective factor is a supportive and loving family and community. The data shows that supporting them and helping them move through the world safely is what helps them the most” explains Dr. Dalke.
Lessen the barriers that loved ones in the LGBTQ community face by: educating family members on their identity, being there as a support in the case of discrimination, advocating for diversity trainings in the workplace and calling out anti-LGBTQ words and actions when you encounter them.
4. Encourage a Healthy Social Life
Having an identity that does not fit into the “norm” can be isolating. Encourage loved ones to be a part of the social circle. Local or online LGBTQ organizations can provide opportunities to connect and make friends. Being a part of the conversation is great for their self-esteem and mental health.
Encourage them to be a part of non-LBGTQ social settings. Involvement in friend and family gatherings is just as important in obtaining full support. Dr. Dalke observes, “Sometimes we don’t ask them about things like crushes like we do for straight kids. Asking the loving and respectful questions you normally would affirms your loved one and shows them acceptance.”
5. Help Your Loved One Access Mental Health Treatment
Since your loved one is at an increased risk for mental health symptoms or illness, getting good treatment is helpful at any time.
Mental illness is an overwhelming feeling. Do some research on treatment options and help in choosing a therapist or treatment facility. LGBTQ patients are more likely to have access issues – they are less likely to have health insurance and are more likely to avoid mental health care because of previous bad experiences. If you can, provide solutions for financial support or other barriers in accessing treatment.
A sense of belonging is pivotal in making sure your loved one’s identity is fully supported and accepted by friends and family. Educate yourself, family members and friends, step in where necessary and advocate for their well-being. The more people they have on their side, the more comfortable they are in facing the stigma and other discriminatory acts.
“By providing your loved one with love, acceptance and affirmation, you are helping them to build resilience, strength and pride for who they are.”
The LGBTQ Clinic at PPI offers support to not only those who identify as LQBTQ+, but their families as well. You can learn more about the clinic in this article, or by calling (717) 782-6420.
Curious about learning more? Check out these references:
- 2020 PA LGBTQ Health Needs Assessment
- GLAAD Media Reference Guide – 11th Edition
- GLAAD Media Reference Guide – LGBTQ Terms
- org Resources on Personal Pronouns
- Home New (centralpalgbtcenter.org)
Sources:
5 Ways to Support Your LGBTQ Loved One’s Mental Health – Constellation Behavioral Health
6 Ways to Support the Mental Health of Your LGBTQ Loved Ones – Talkspace